We got some great news yesterday. First, the results of my latest lumbar puncture were negative, meaning there is no sign of cancer in my central nervous system. Thank God for that. I still have to endure the lumbar punctures for the next year as a precaution, but the frequency is now less.
The second piece of good news doesn’t seem real yet. Barring any setbacks, I get to go home tomorrow evening, Thursday, June 6. The doctors have started taking me off some of the antibiotics and fluids in preparation for my discharge. I haven’t had a high fever for several days now, but if I get one before tomorrow afternoon then all bets are off and I stay here. Same for when I get home: if I get a fever, then I have to come back. There is a price to leaving, however. I’ll have a bone marrow biopsy and lumbar puncture tomorrow afternoon before being discharged. My stay at home will likely be brief, as well, since I’ll be admitted again late next week or early the following week to have more chemotherapy. The length of my next stay will be either six days or a month, depending on the results of the bone marrow biopsy. Please pray for no cancer in my bone marrow.
Home. The thought is surreal. Sure, I’ve been gone for longer periods and am no stranger to homecomings, thanks to the Army. But this is different. The previous times I’ve been gone for deployments it was by choice, albeit one I made years before. I also had time to prepare. This time my absence came about quickly and wasn’t something that I had chosen. All that was normal and comfortable and right was suddenly gone, exchanged for a new normal that was based on utility rather than the relationships with those I love. Home – there really is no place like it.
As excited as I am to get there, I can’t help but be reminded that this world really isn’t my home. For this world is not our permanent home; we are looking forward to a home yet to come. (Hebrews 13:14 NLT). I wish I could say that I have a longing for Heaven that’s as strong as my current desire to get home. Perhaps I will someday as my faith grows. What I do know to be true is that we are not meant to be comfortable in this world. As much as I desire that, it isn’t the purpose for which I was created. God didn’t make us to pursue a life of comfort; He made us to pursue his glory. I am so thankful to be going home, but it’s important to keep it in the proper perspective.
So we are always confident, even though we know that as long as we live in these bodies we are not at home with the Lord. For we live by believing and not by seeing. Yes, we are fully confident, and we would rather be away from these earthly bodies, for then we will be at home with the Lord. (2 Corinthians 5:6-8 NLT)
Sir. i am spc Fenoglio. i am in det 1 in williamsburg. you gave me and some budies of mine a ride when we came home at camp atterbury. ill never forget the relief i had when i got into the vehicle and heard christian music for the first time in a long time. Ive been involved in church all my life. My wife and i teach sunday school. but christianity is meaningless unless its real. i can see that Jesus is real to you like he is to me. ill have my church and class pray for you. praying for healing. -SPC Fenoglio
SPC Fenoglio, thanks for your comment. That is very encouraging to me. I guess we never know when God is using us to speak to someone. Thanks for your prayers.