Today is Day 1 of five days of chemotherapy. I am having this round to hopefully prevent the leukemia from returning while we wait for the transplant, which is tentatively scheduled for September 9. I’ll be admitted to the hospital about a week before the transplant to receive more chemotherapy. Right now, we are waiting on the donor to be ready and gain approval from my insurance. All my tests for the “work up” turned out fine, so the pieces of the puzzle are starting to fall in place. I’ve been home for five weeks now, minus the short stint in the hospital for the fever a couple weeks ago. I feel great and love getting to be a husband and a father.
To be sure, there are a lot of things that could go wrong still. The cancer could come back despite the chemotherapy. I could get an infection since my immune system is still low. I could be crushed by a piece of falling space junk while walking outside.
I’m choosing not to focus on any of these possibilities because, as I consider what has happened over the last three months, I can easily see the hand of God on this entire situation. Take what’s happening now. I was prepared for a 6-day stay in the hospital for this round of chemotherapy. Instead, I get the good news that it’s outpatient and the side effects are not as severe as with the drugs I’ve had previously. Sure, I have to drive to Lexington every day this week, but who cares when I am still able to tuck my girls in bed and kiss my wife goodnight. Even more, this will not delay the transplant and I should have another three weeks at home. What a blessing!
This whole process to get to the transplant has seemed daunting at times, not to mention what comes after I get the stem cells. Getting the cancer into remission and keeping it there, finding a donor, staying otherwise healthy, obtaining insurance approval – all these things are large pieces of the puzzle that can individually seem almost impossible to set in place. Certainly I could not will them to happen on my own. But, my Healer, through whom all things have been created, is capable of shaping each piece, placing it where it needs to be, and then holding it all together. He is the one who does the heavy lifting and sets things in order. All that is required of me is to believe.
The Son is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. For in him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things have been created through him and for him. He is before all things, and in him all things hold together. (Colossians 1:15-17 NIV)