A haircut. A massage. A gallon of milk. Mowing the lawn. Babysitting our girls. A couple hundred dollars to defray expenses. A race ran in my honor.
These are just a few examples of the myriad blessings that family, friends, and strangers have given us since I’ve been sick. Each one was unexpected but very much appreciated. The blessing was often unique to the giver – something they could do within their gifts or means to help us.
Take for instance the haircut. Christi went a few weeks ago for a cut and highlights. When it was over, the stylist lovingly told her that there was no charge. What? But that’s a lot of money? Are you sure? It was hard for Christi to accept, but she did. And then there’s my neck and back pain. I’ve been hurting for a couple weeks now, a product of overdoing things with my out-of-shape body since being home. My chiropractor and massage therapist have both worked on my back without cost. It’s not that we can’t afford it and they’re just being generous; it’s their way of showing love and blessing us in their unique way.
I always seem to over-thank those who do things like this and make remarks like, “Are you sure?” and “I hate to take advantage of you.” The truth is that it’s hard to be served, especially when one is used to being very independent. Pride jumps in and says, “You can’t take care of yourself!” Like next week, when I have to rely on my uncle and my wife to take me to the hospital on Tuesday and Wednesday, respectively, to have a catheter put in my chest and another bone marrow biopsy. I’d much rather drive myself than to have to rely on someone else. There is the silly thought in the back of my mind that I’ll be seen as needy and others will come to resent me. My family, of course, would never think that.
Isn’t this what the body of Christ is all about? I mean the larger body, all believers, not just those in our church. Jesus said that he “did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” (Matthew 20:28, NIV). For one to serve (give), however, there also has to be a recipient. In this case, it’s us.
Jesus was talking to his disciples just before he was to be arrested when he said,
“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” (John 13:34-35, NIV).
As his disciples, we are called to love other believers. This is how the world will know us, not by the fish stickers on our cars or clever t-shirts we wear, but how we love. This is exactly what Christi and I are experiencing. We are being loved. We are receiving in our time of need exactly what Jesus commanded of his followers. When we refuse or reluctantly accept such blessings, then we are denying others the opportunity to put their faith into action. There will be a time when we’ll be in a position to serve again rather than be served, but in the meantime we are thankful and humbled for what we have been given.
Jeff, the weight of being served used to be a much heavier load for me. Whenever someone would offer to be of service, my natural response was, “Thank you, but that’s quite alright – I’ll be ok.” That is until one day when I offered that cookie-cutter response to a particular well-meaning individual. In turn, he looked at me (rather sternly) and said, “don’t rob me of my blessing.” That moment, that exchange, changed my thought process. Sure it can be tough to “be served” but I now try to take a look at it through the eyes of the person offering and with God’s lens – He calls upon us to be servants. In allowing genuine, good-hearted people to serve when they have the opportunity, ability, and desire I am not only receiving the benefit of their generosity, I am also allowing them the opportunity to receive their blessing and be just a tad more Christ-like in their service. I will never again try to rob someone of their blessing.
All that being said, it is a true testament of the man you are and a reflection of all the service you’ve provided that so many have the desire to help… I don’t think anyone would ever think you were taking advantage of the situation.
Allow those blessings – for yourself, your family, AND those who are serving you.
That’s a great point about allowing the giver to be blessed. It really is better to give than receive. Thanks for sharing.